Diffusion//

Red streams pierced into the clouds as blood vessels while the sun began to abscond.  The orange mixed with the white fluff as if a Picasso had blended two paint spots into one. 

I have ditched my body into an intimidating environment, first in an upperclassmen dormitory (Tripp Hall) and then in upper level classes while most of my friends stick with floor mates from last year.  I felt lonesome during the first few nights in the residence hall as no one would continue conversations I had started other than my roommate and friend John.  Thinking about my experience at Ogg Hall, I have only known John since April after I received the residence confirmation letter, and perhaps I know him more than my ex-roommate Joe already (I know that is sad but I did not talk to Joe much since we had different schedules).  However, others walked around the floor as dead bodies with their souls missing in the atmosphere.  I never encountered Ogg Hall¡¦s friendly atmosphere here where people would knock on the door and invite others to events or just to chat.  In the two graduate level classes, my stomach rumbled as I was the only sophomore with a different major in class compared to the senior engineers, medical school students, and graduates.

I, like a cloud, diffuse myself into the vast skies as time progresses.  Although I am different as an alien or a stranger, I started to explore the whole new world.  Troy was the first person I met and knew at Tripp Hall, and he is a pharmacy school student!  I chatted with him in the bathroom last night as we brushed our teeth, and he simply released the daunting particles from a lopsided bubble into the air. 

The upper level classes were going well, and I enjoyed learning the content.  ¡¥Tis nice to meet new faces as well.  In the Biocore lecture, I met Jim, who is an electrical engineer that is auditing the class.  He seemed to be older than the other students (since they are all sophomores as well), but he was approachable and nice when we worked together on the first lecture.  His pink rollerblades were awesome, and I really admire his attitude of continuing studies in life.  Other than that, I also met Chad and Mingwei, whom I met this summer.  At today¡¦s discussion, a familiar face came towards me and I could not believe that he was from my Chem 109H class last fall!  I was really surprised when Barry remembered me cause I did not know his name or talk to him by then.  In other classes, I also see familiar faces, such as Kevin from my Spanish class at Spring, Brian who always competes with me on tests, and Stefanie and Jorien from my workplace.  I am glad to have classes with those folks.

Sophomore year is certainly different from freshman¡¦s.  I have mostly been out of the room from 8 or 9 in the morning until 6 or 7pm.  Courses are tougher as well.  I have a paper that is due on Monday already!  Argh I¡¦m gonna be an all-nighter tonight and tomorrow.  However, I really enjoy having only one class on Fridays =)

Other than all those exciting classes, ¡¥tis funny when I met Dan after my biocore discussion.  He was heading to class, and I cannot believe that I met him today.  Haha I remembered us working on Linguistics homework back at Ogg (where he mostly copied mine¡Kjust kiddin¡¦) and eating lunch on summery Tuesdays when he was attending summer school here¡Kand this evening as I was heading back from Starbuck¡¦s to my place, I bumped into Drew, who is Dan¡¦s current roommate!  Drew is an amazing guy who studied with me at Ogg Hall¡¦s first floor study area last school year around 1 to 3 in the morning, and I cannot believe that he and Dan are roommates since Dan sleeps really early around 11 or 12.  I will have to drop by their apartment, give them items (cookies, soap, and other items) I bought from Taiwan, and take pictures with them this Saturday!

Lab is moving to the building across Henry Mall, and I will have to help until next Tuesday.  I cannot wait to work in a new environment =)

Life is spicing up already, and I am livin¡¦ and lovin¡¦ it, and making the most out of it.  I might not update this as often for a school year, but I will surely post items if needed (when I need to complain, bite people, or share joy).  For now, I just hope to have a peaceful and successful year, and old acquaintances should NOT be forgotten nor never come to mind¡Kbut new ones are wonderful too!

Alles liebe.

Lonely, I'm Mr. Lonely I have nobody for my own...

Perhaps I am designed by God to be stuck with books and work, but not with people.

Charity is right.  Her comment from before:

"It wouldn't be natural if you're in contact with everyone. I believe in fate, so I think if that person just doesn't have much in common with you, you both would go seperate ways. Everything should be natural, don't force yourself to be friends with people if that person doesn't like anything you do or even people you actually don't really know about. It's hard to lose a friend you thought you were pretty close with, but it happens sometimes. Happened to me several times. It's painful but for the better."

Time will change everyone, and 'tis impossible for me to keep in touch with everyone I used to know before.

I noticed Joel (one of my floormates from Ogg Hall last year) walking around Tripp's yard with his cellphone, and I was so surprised to see him since I know that most people from that floor moved into apartments, same with my ex-roommate Joe.  He took me to his room where his amigos were playing Mario Cart, and 'tis nice to meet people you have not seen for months (well, only three in this case).  His friends are friendly too, but I rejected the invitation to play video games since I gotta prepare for the Memorial Union (MU) Bash.  Haha I was late for it too... 

During the MU Bash last night, I felt as if I do not really have any close rings of friends.  I am a settler who jumps from group to group in order to meet different folks, but at the end, I do not have a strong ring of friends since they are all scattered around.  I always admire Charity with her close roommates and friends, John with his girlfriend Nina (who scared me as she was in the room yesterday) and his gang, Dan with his Korean gang, and perhaps all of the other folks on my facebook.  While taking to Kevin and Sam, whom I knew really well last semester, I did not notice a close tide nor any common areas among us anymore.  Those boring "hi" messages made me fall asleep, and perhaps asking about their summers is not interesting enough.  They have their own circle at Sellery and Kronshage, and maybe I am just different from everyone.  After volunteering for Wisconsin Union Directorate Community Service and Student Performance Committees last night by making cards and guarding booths, I simply stared at hordes as they passed by me if I did not exist.  Stefanie nicely invited me to play cards with her twin sister and friends at the Raftskeller, but I left at the end.  I intended to watch Napolean Dynamite since everyone told me 'tis a cool movie, and I decided to revisit it since I did not understand why one would mock a poor child with beaver teeth, but the movie bored me so I left after five minutes of staring at the screen.

I went back to Tripp, noticing that I am the only one in Fallows House, so I went to bed earlier.

Is there a barrier between me and people here?  Perhaps life will be easier if I am a female.  Even Adam, my friend at WUD's Student Performance Committee, indicated that hot females would be more successful in this university compared to us, being Adam and me.  In this masculine society, most of us would ignore or neglect women's behavior.  In parties, no one will care if they take their clothes off or dance tightly on other men.  For man, 'tis a different story.  On State Street, one can easily see lesbians kissing under the sun, but no two males would dare to do that.  I also notice that females gain friends easily since most hungry males around me go after them.

I am really glad to have met some folks at Tripp yesterday after Eric dropped off my missing 70 percent of my luggages (thanks Eric!).  Two lovely ladies came by to say hi as they noticed my luggages and carts blocking the hallway.  I did not remember their names, but I only remember that they live on the second or third floor of the High House.  Then, Troy (who lives at the 1 o'clock position from my room) came over and introduced himself.  He seemed to be a really cool guy, a student in pharmacy school.  We chatted for a bit when I was decorating my room and when he was glaring at the pineapple cakes I gave him.  Oh yeah, I'm glad that the housefellow (Kene) remembers my name although I still have trouble pronouncing his...Haha I hope that the folks like the pineapple cakes here!

Perhaps Tripp Hall is the true environment I am seeking.  I do not party (which is considered to be a GREAT way to socialize and meet new folks) nor dance around with beer bottles and date folks.  Although I missed the friendly atmosphere at Ogg Hall, I really do hate the drunk folks doing pushups on my door and throwing pizza slices onto the wall.  Perhaps Tripp's quiet atmosphere suited me more as I am here in Wisconsin to study, not to be entertained.

I am the first one to arrive at work, and I will have to go soon.  Choir audition starts at 11:56, and then I might just grab lunch from State Street and wander around.  Who knows what will happen?

Maybe I will feel different when school starts (which is, SOON!).  Perhaps the school can accompany me and keep me busy.  I know that I will meet more funny looking faces and collaborate on projects and reports, and by then I might not have time to wander around by myself anymore.  Perhaps I think too much.

Haseeb is here.  Time to work now.

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edit as of 1 Sept 2005

School starts tomorrow...and after working today...

I've received an email from Bryan aka Fondue!!!  Haha wow I can't believe that he at least still remembers me =)  I do hope to meet him soon.  He made my day today =D

Testing one two three.  Just trying to "hide" those picture entries so my xanga can look normal.

Single serving friends

I am finally in Madison.

During my flights to Taiwan and the states, I chatted with some folks sitting around me, and soon as the journey ended, POOF--they were gone.

Everyone is heading towards different directions, landing on various cities, and aiming for numerous goals.  I, too.

After moving into Tripp Hall, I rearranged my area since I hate the original stiffness in the room where tables form a dissection line in the middle of the room going through the door.  The beds were beside, and it seemed as if John and I were not even roommates!  So I shoved across the table and the dresser, which actually gave me more space to move.

And of course, I saw John today.  Too bad he will be stuck with me for a year.  Hey, he tasted a pineapple cake and he liked it.  He ain't a big fan of cabbages, and I guess kimchis might be a bit spicy for him.

I'm really sleepy now...argh...apparently, I did not sleep well on the plane...I hope that I will not sleep through my first class!

Gotta help John loft his bed later.  I'm gonna take a nap.  Take care everyone and cya someday.

Sorry, but you can tell that I am not spending that much time on my entries these days since they're kinda short and meaningless.  Oh well, gotta zzz and gain energy first.

Time to say goodbye.

Within a few minutes, I will be heading to Taoyuan's airport with my family and then I will be walking back into reality again.  Life in Taiwan is like Heaven with unlimited fruits and mingling.  I said goodbye to Coaches Lin and Chen today, and Coach Lin kept joking about me inhaling drugs since he heard about my blood tests (at least that's better than saying that I am pregnant)...haha he's a really funny guy, and I do hope to keep in touch with both of the coaches.  I also wish them godspeed as they apply for graduate school!

My goals in Madison will be to study hard and to be fit along with gaining meaningful relationships.  Haha having a roommate is also useful as well.  At first, I was disappointed at not being able to reserve a single room, but after talking with my roommate for a bit, I found him to be nice, and he became a friend.  At least he won't bite, but he doesn't really talk much...Heh well he can be my alarm clock too!

Oh, and of course, I gotta continue the weekly ritual of calling back to my family and relatives in Taiwan.

Too many wonderful things happened this month, and last entry is not enough.  I got closer with many of my cousins, encouraged one to attend a U.S. graduate school, bought food and gifts for relatives, and spend time with family.  Perhaps I do not regret on not meeting up with many people or graduates from my high school.

I know that I will miss Taiwan a lot, and I will cry when I entered the terminal with my parents behind the windows.  May this be another preparation entry.

Life between two points is hard.  Although I will be sad about leaving Taiwan, I am actually happy to meet many folks when school starts!  Haha I gotta contact them as soon as I reached Madtown or else everyone will be busy again.  The only negative thing is that I have lost contact with Fondue the entire summer, and I felt guilty for that.  He's gonna be in a fraternity with many activities, and perhaps I am just different from him.  I do have to admit that many people I know are more outgoing and extroverted than I am, and I do have some conservative Taiwanese views (you can tell by my clothing and working attitude).  Oh well, we will see what will happen.

After school starts, I will barely or even NOT touch this for a while until breaks or special events with pictures.  I do hope that everyone can have another successful year and may our wishes come true too!

'Tis about time.  I have to go now.  May we meet again one day.